My doctor prescribed bed rest for bronchitis. I do not do bed rest. Who can stay in bed all day without a man? Fortunately, Hallmark Channel was showing Christmas in July movies. After watching every movie twice, making my Christmas list (that I will never find in December) and drinking hot tea until I…
Hey Daddy, Here Are Signs That Mommy Needs a Date
When you ask Mommy what she would like for breakfast, lunch, dinner, Christmas, Mother’s Day and any other occasion and her answer is SLEEP, it’s time. If Mommy’s new hair style resembles an electrocution in a ponytail, it’s time. Do her eyebrows resemble caterpillars? It’s really time! If Mommy’s favorite jacket has shoulders covered in…
Working With Bitchy People
I am starting a petition for all bitchy co-workers to just stay the hell home. The office doesn’t need your miserable prancing around spreading your misery. Seriously, the hair on my neck stands up. I feel like I’m preparing for an attack every time this person passes me to go to the copy room. I…
This Autumn Hen Is Off Duty
I’m no longer a spring chicken. I’m more like an autumn hen. I don’t prance, but I can still slink. That’s the good news. Yesterday it finally dawned on me that I seriously need to start taking care of this old hen. My chest had been feeling tight lately, so I thought I’d better get to my doctor….
For The Love…60 Shades
I confess. I read the books. All three of them! I read them before my daughters, who were shocked that I would read one, let alone all three. It’s not like we haven’t all fallen into an interview and been seduced by a wealthy, odd, sex maniac. Come on, you know it’s true. We’ve…
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