I really thought I’d lost it. I didn’t feel hot anymore. I don’t mean hot flashes, I mean hot, like sexy lady….a Hottie. I used to be hot. In my twenties men would ask me to date them or just go to their apartment. After I had five children and now three grandkids, they stopped calling.
My husband kept hanging up on them! I decided it was time to pass the Hottie crown to the younger babes. And then it happened!
The next morning, I realized that I still have it! I grabbed my Hottie crown back so fast I almost got dizzy. What a relief to feel like my sexy self again. I knew somewhere deep down I still had it. Maybe you are like me and also wondering if you still have it. I’ll share my test with you.
Step 1- Get an industrial size bag of mini-chocolate bars.
Step 2- Prop yourself up in bed and get comfy. Fluff your pillows and prepare.
Step 3- Remove six bars from the bag and eat five. Savor the chocolate as it melts slowly in your mouth.
Step 4- Place the last bar under the covers.
Step 5- Go to sleep and dream about how beautifully sexy you are.
In the morning, wake up slowly. There is no rush. Stretch, yawn and stretch some more. Now gently get out of bed and look under the covers for the last chocolate bar. When you find it, gently scoop it up and feel the texture. If it is melted. You have passed the Hottie test.
I’ve eaten three large bags of chocolate bars proving my theory. I didn’t want to announce to the world that I am still a Hottie until I had confirmed all of the evidence.
And now I can proclaim to the world that for the past 90 nights, I have endured intense physical testing and I have passed.
Let me introduce myself….Anne Bardsley…the 61 year old Hottie with chocolate on her face.