Last night, my husband, Scott, looked at me very seriously. “Things are not good,” he said. He’d
been to the doctor so I presumed he got a bad test result. In a panic I asked, “What happened?
Did your blood work come back with bad results? Was it your chest X-ray? Oh my God, do you
have cancer? Do you have high blood pressure? Is it your heart?” I had imagined that he had
gotten very grave results for his face to be this pale and grave. He took my hands in his and
said, “No It’s worse than that.“
I started to cry.
“I am sleeping with a grandmother, “ he said quietly.
“Who is she?” I yelled. “How dare you have an affair! After all these years! I thought we were
happy.” Now I was angry. “What the hell is the matter with you?” I screamed.
“We have kids and grandkids. You give Communion a t church, for God’s sake. What kind of
Holy, Catholic man are you anyway?” He tried to speak, but I wouldn’t let him get a word in.
“You are a pathetic excuse for a man!” I raged.
He started to laugh. This only infuriated me more. I started slamming things and cursing.
“Well, it seems you are a potty mouth Catholic girl,” he laughed.
“Besides the fact that you are cheating, who has an affair with a grandmother? Don’t men
usually find young, beautiful women for that? Are you stupid and a cheater?”
“Now stop” he said. “She is a beautiful woman and I love her.”
“You love her?” I screeched! I needed to run away and never come back.
We’ve been married for 35 years and I really thought we had a great marriage. Some of our
friends tell us we’re blessed that we still like and love each other after all those years. Wait until
I tell them this!
“I think you should move out,” I told him. I hate when men cheat and women just put up with
it. No siree! I am a strong woman and he needed to go. Why was he still laughing?
“Anne, I really do love you. It’s not your fault that I’m sleeping with a grandmother. I slept with
her last night”
“Last night? After I went to sleep?” I could feel the rage coming back and I demanded, “Who is
this grandmother you like to sleep with anyway? Just tell me now!”
“It’s you,” he said. “Wow! You’re feisty when you’re angry. I didn’t think you cared this much.
You must really like me after all these years.” He winked at me and asked, “How do you feel
about sleeping with a grandfather?”
He is so lucky I still love him.