Get ready to rumble for the 2016 conference! I roomed with two FB friends. We had an adjoining room with two other friends. Another friend was just two doors away. We jokingly referred to ourselves as “The Cool Kids!”
Arriving a day early was an added bonus to get settled in, meet people, and have time to scour the schedule.
All three of us in room 473 got chosen for the Stand Up Comedy Night. There were endless rehearsals and I actually knew their routines by heart. I couldn’t keep my own routine straight in my head. This caused our relaxation period, complete with Jellyfish shots. Who knew they calmed the brain so well?
I wish the conference was an additional day. I missed so many classes that got rave reviews. I regret that I missed Cathy and Cindy, but I bought their book. I am working on my Queen-self currently. Their story is so honest and inspiring. I wish they were my neighbors.
I learned so much from each presenter:
Alan Zwiebel: Be prepared when opportunity arises. If I ever need a talking horse, put syrup on their lips and they look like they’re actually speaking. (When SNL interviewed Mrs. Ed after Mr. Ed died) Hilarious story!
Katrina Kittle: Use vivid descriptions. Show the reader: She did not just drop her purse. “Her Dior purse spilled over and four tampons rolled onto the meeting floor.” Take the reader into the story.
Judy Carter: Everyday life is really funny. Your pain has a humorous side, as well. Don’t miss this class!
Elaine Ambrose: Snag the reader with the first line and keep it rolling. Be aware that you might lose the reader if the first paragraph isn’t compelling. Sing and lighten up with life! My example, “Moms, the string from a pork roast should never be used for an at-home tubal ligation, even on your worst day.” (from my story offering tips to moms with young kids)
Wendy Liebman: Funny lady. Wish I learned more about her stage presence and her craft. I so love her style of humor.
Leighann Lord: She made me laugh and cry at her dinner speech. She was funny, tender and real. I love her even more now.
Pitchapalooza was great! With only one minute to sell your book, your words better be well chosen and damn interesting. Get them down, Anne!
My face was soaked watching Barbara Chisholm performing At Wit’s End. I was close enough to watch Erma’s family reactions. One tear from her daughter and I joined right in. What a lovely performance and a sweet tribute to Erma.
And from my roommates I learned things that I will carry with me for life. They transformed me with their talents, such as:
Yiddish…. Schvitzing is sweating. Thank you, Parri Sontag. I’m now bilingual and can sweat like a Jewish gal.
The Oscar Meyer bologna song, Bob Dylan style, from Linda Roy. I sing it daily now.
How to hide under eye circles, from our class pres, Vikki Claflin. Priceless!
Tequila and The Magic Fishing Panties stories from Kim Dalphres….buying a boat when I get home.
Marcia Kester Doyle taught me to steal a half bottle of wine. (okay 3/4) Bless her heart.
It was so much to learn in so little time!
The staff was so sweet and professional, as always.
This really is a sisterhood. There is so much sharing of ideas and contacts, without competition. It’s takes a village to make a writer.
Can’t wait until 2018. I will be thirty pounds thinner then. Oh Wait! Now that I am a queen, I love myself as I am. I will just show up as myself, wearing a majestically jeweled crown, with a big smile on my face! I’ll blend right in with all of the other queens.
I think Erma would be very proud of the conference you put on this year, Teri and Anne. Your group did a fabulous job!
And you taught us how to take the perfect sexy selfie, cooing all the while…but to always be sure it doesn’t end up somewhere in the outer galaxy! We had such a great time! Can’t wait for 2018!
Love your recap, Queen Bardsley. What a grand and glorious time!
One of THE best weekends of my life! Don’t forget the dry Vag song and the Urban cowboy who serenaded Parri!
What a wonderful tribute. It was a week to remember! I learned so much and was inspired by so many friends, old and new. And I felt validated … like every speaker had a hidden message just for me! I loved the sisterhood I felt and us all rooming together made me feel like I was in college again.Thanks for making the kid in leisure suits, a Girl Scout beanie and orthodontic headgear feel cool! My only regret is that we didn’t get a picture in our CPAP masks!
I love these so called ladies, of which I am one!